Heterosexist+Speech

Heterosexist Speech

By, Whitney Olson What it means? //Individual heterosexism// refers to attitudes, behaviors, and language that disparage gay men and lesbians and includes the belief that all sexual behavior that is not heterosexual is unnatural and deserving of criticism and condemnation.Individual heterosexism includes the idea that homosexuals are more likely to commit crimes(actually they are neither more or less likely). It also includes the belief that homosexuals cannot maintain stable relationships or effectively raise children, an belief that contradicts research evidence. //Institutional heterosexism//, some examples are the ban on gay marriage in many states and only a few states allow gay marriage, the U.S. military's prohibition on service by openly gay men, the Catholic Church's ban on homosexual priests, the many laws prohibition the adoption of children by gay couples, and in some cultures homosexual relations are illegal: penalties range from the punishment for a "misdemeanor" in Liberia to life in jail in Singapore and death in Pakistan. Heterosexual speech includes derogatory terms used for lesbians and gay men. For example, surveys in the military showed that that 80 percent of those surveyed had heard "offensive speech, derogatory names, jokes or remarks about gays" and that 85 percent believed that such derogatory speech was "tolerated."

How can we be sensitive to it?
 * Avoid offensive nonverbal mannerisms that parody stereotypes when talking about gay men and lesbians. Avoid the "startle eye blink" with which some people react to gay couples.
 * Avoid "complimenting" gay men and lesbians by saying that they "don't look it." This is not a compliment.
 * Avoid making the assumption that ever gay or lesbian knows what every other gay or lesbian is thinking.
 * Avoid denying individual differences. Comments such as "Lesbians are so loyal" or "Gay men are so open with their feelings" ignore the reality of wide differences within any group and are potentially insulting to all groups.
 * Avoid over attribution- the tendency to attributes almost everything a person does, says, and believes to the fact that the person is gay or lesbian. This tendency helps to activate and perpetuate stereotypes.
 * Remember that relationship milestones are important to all people. Ignoring anniversaries or, say, the birthday of a relative's partner is bound to cause resentment.